The Big Speech: Understudy WIP 01

Understudy

Dialog NORA Remembered: You do know I'll have to leave
you eventually, don't you?

Dialog ofscr, recording, Stephen singing: The Wheels on the bus
go round and round, round and round, round and round...

Dialog recording, Stephen singing: The Wheels on the bus go
round and round, round and round, round and round...

Dialog recording, STEPHEN singing: The Wheels on the bus go
round and round, round and round, round and round...

Dialog NORA: Hey

Dialog STEPHEN: uh...

Dialog STEPHEN: ...hey... uh...

Dialog STEPHEN: What are you doing?

Dialog NORA: Learning about numbers

Dialog STEPHEN: No really, Nora- What are you doing?

Dialog NORA: Well.... If you really wanna know, I'm just
sat here trying to work out what's weirder- you stealing Josh's Best Actor award, or you dressed up as a massive singing dancing squirrel.

Dialog NORA: Usually I'd say it was steling the award.
Until I started watching this, that is. Now I'm not so sure...

Dialog Recording: if you're happy and you know it, shout
we are!

Dialog NORA Offscr: We are...

Dialog NORA: don't you dare!

Dialog NORA: Well... it's a look

Dialog Stephen: It certainly is

Dialog Offscr Recording: If you're happy and you know it,
stomp your feet

Dialog STEPHEN: //breathes deep// Of course, another question...

Dialog STEPHEN contin: Might be, what gave you the right
to start nosing around in my stuff?

Dialog NORA: LOOK /Sammy/ - I understand. You're not happy
and I know it. But I wasn't "nosing around"

Dialog NORA contin: . It's just I was cold and
I was looking in your wardrobe for a sweater, or a blanket or something...

Dialog NORA contin: ...and I sort of stumbled upon... these

Dialog STEPHEN: That still doesn't give you the right to--

Dialog NORA: I was going to put them back and
pretend that I hadn't seen them, but- well, I'm sorry, but some things are pretty hard to ignore, Steve.

Dialog NORA: ugh...

Dialog NORA: Y'know...

Dialog NORA contin: Y'know most guys would just have porno
hidden in the back of their wardrobes...

Dialog STEPHEN: Would that be better or worse?

Dialog NORA: It's a close call, Steve. It's a very
close call. It it was a DVD of say, you in a squirrel costume having sex with my husbands BAFTA, that might conceivably have been worse...

Dialog NORA contin: ...You're very good by the way

Dialog STEPHEN: It's the role I was born to play

Dialog NORA: I think this is the moment where you
say "there's a perfectly rational explanation for all this"

Dialog STEPHEN: There is.

Dialog NORA: I'm all ears...

Dialog NORA contin: ... as indeed, are you

Dialog STEPHEN ofscr: OK, well...

Dialog STEPHEN... well...

Dialog STEPHEN: THIS...

Dialog STEPHEN: This I do partly for the money, and
partle because I enjoy-

Dialog NORA ofscr: DO?

Dialog STEPHEN: Sorry?

Dialog NORA: You said "Do" not "did"

Dialog STEPHEN: I've been filming the sequel...

Dialog NORA: I thought you said it was a tough
indie crime thriller.

Dialog STEPHEN: ...set in a woodland...

Dialog Sammy the Squirrel Recording: So when I have two
hazelnuts, and I get another TWO hazelnuts, what do I get then BRIAN?

Dialog STEPHEN: In my defence, I actually think I'm pretty
good

Dialog NORA: You are, but isn't there a scale issue
here?

Dialog STEPHEN: That's exactly what I told the director

Dialog NORA: This is one dumb bear

Dialog STEPHEN: That's true...

Dialog NORA: FOUR hazelnuts! You owe him four hazelnuts, you
idiot!

Dialog STEPHEN: Nora, you are listening to me, aren't you?

Dialog NORA: I'm sorry but I'm finding it impossible to
look away

Dialog STEPHEN: well...

Dialog STEPHEN contin: ... could you try, NORA? Please? You're
not making this easy for me...

Dialog NORA: I have no intention of making it easy
for you

Dialog NORA: STEPHEN this -nods- THIS is fine... This I
don't mind. In fact it's actually almost quite cute in a... sinister kind of way.

Dialog NORA contin: To be honest, I'm a little more
concerned about...

Dialog NORA contin: ...about...

Dialog NORA contin: ...This.

Dialog NORA: I mean, it wouldn't be so bad if
you'd stolen- I don't know - cash or something

Dialog STEPHEN: I didn't /steal/ anything

Dialog SNORA: So what happened then?

Dialog STEPHEN: Well...

Dialog STEPHEN contin: ...well the thing is, you remember that
party, where we first met? Do you...

Dialog STEPHEN ofscr: pleas, do you mind if I turn
this thing off?!

Dialog NORA: Fine. I'll pause it.

Dialog NORA: I don't want to miss anything...

Dialog STEPHEN: OK, well, that party, you know, when I
drank a little too much, and had that weird attack because of those antibiotics I’d been taking.

Dialog STEPHEN contin: ...Well I was in your bedroom, and
I saw Josh’s award, and I was picking it up, just to look at it, and I was, you know, goofing around in front of the mirror when you came back in the room, to say the cab was there, remember?...

Dialog STEPHEN contin: ...And I clearly wasn’t thinking straight, because
I sort of stuffed it under my coat...

Dialog STEPHEN contin: and the next thing I knew I
was in the taxi on the way home, and I still had this… thing.

Dialog NORA: So let me get this straight,- you stole
my husband's Best Actor award--

Dialog STEPHEN: Not "stole" just... misplaced it in my flat...

Dialog STEPHEN: ...Temporarily...

Dialog NORA: You temporarily misplaced my husband's Best Actor award
in your flat because you'd been taking antibiotics?

Dialog STEPHEN: Well, no, not just because of that. It
was booze mainly, but...

Dialog NORA: And Josh's affair?

Dialog STEPHEN: Affair?

Dialog NORA: affair's a stupid word- this woman, these... women,
he's been seeing

The Big Speech: Understudy WIP 01

The Big Speech: Understudy WIP 01

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