Not all TLS deployments are created equal. Poorly configured TLS can can trick users into thinking their browsing experience is safe, yet leave them vulnerable to devastating man in the middle attacks, surveillance, and identity theft. Not to mention, a janky TLS setup can slow your otherwise performant site to a halt. In my talk, I will provide a primer on how to set up TLS for strong security and excellent performance. Additionally, I will discuss the TLS protocol to better familiarize the audience about the way that certificate and public key cryptography works to provide a secure web experience.