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Open Source Misfeasance

Zach Holman
November 20, 2012

Open Source Misfeasance

DID YOU KNOW OPEN SOURCE IS A SWIMMING POOL FILLED WITH MILK SHAKES AND A WALRUS. Seriously it's amazing. I don't think people realize how amazing open source can be for your life, for your salary, and your company. Life shouldn't be all about Linux device drivers and suicidal key value stores; build silly things. With a little spit-shining and a lot of dumb ideas, we can all grow to become the Notorious B.I.G. of open source. (Minus the guns, drugs, and eventual murder. Unless that's what you're into, I mean.)

Zach Holman

November 20, 2012
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  1. open source misfeasance

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  2. open source misfeasance

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  3. open source malfeasance
    hostile, aggressive action taken to
    injure the client's interests
    :

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  4. open source misfeasance
    to take inappropriate action or give
    intentionally incorrect advice
    :

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  5. open source should be a playground

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  6. open source should be exploration

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  7. open source should be a drunken
    tequila bender

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  8. have some fun with it

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  9. if you’re a newbie:
    commit to an open source
    project by the end of this talk

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  10. if you’re a veteran:
    rediscover open source.
    get excited about building.

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  11. @holman my cousin
    who doesn’t know
    open source but
    he’s still cool

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  12. github, inc.

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  13. how to fake being an okay programmer

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  14. I’M A HORRIBLE PROGRAMMER
    NOW WHAT?

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  15. open source is a scary jump

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  16. like everything else,
    you don’t have to be smart
    to be successful

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  17. it’s magical until you realize nobody
    knows what the hell they’re doing
    open source is like being an adult

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  18. so how do you fake being smart?

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  19. so how do you fake being smart?
    u dont

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  20. bash shell script

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  21. $ spark 0 30 55 80 33 150
    …‧
‪‧‬

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  22. I HAD NO IDEA WHAT A BASH SHELL IS

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  23. people are good at fixing your mistakes

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  24. people are good at fixing your mistakes
    and telling you exactly why you’re wrong

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  25. people are good at fixing your mistakes
    and telling you exactly why you’re wrong
    and possibly calling you names

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  26. people are good at fixing your mistakes
    and telling you exactly why you’re wrong
    and possibly calling you names
    and lolling at your language

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  27. start viewing this as an advantage

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  28. you learn it more, you fake it less

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  29. LONG TAIL
    OPEN SOURCE

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  30. nike+ to garmin mile tracker for runners

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  31. outdoor activities frighten nerds

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  32. outdoor activities frighten nerds

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  33. exploit your hobbies

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  34. PHOTOGRAPHY
    exploit your hobbies
    · MUSIC · GEOCACHING
    FORGING CHECKS · VOTER FRAUD · KNITTING
    · ART

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  35. exploit your hobbies
    HINT: YOUR HOBBIES DO NOT INCLUDE ANOTHER
    GODDAMN NODE.JS TESTING FRAMEWORK

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  36. highest impact-to-effort

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  37. exploiting open source for pleasure

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  38. code is a hugely creative endeavor

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  39. open source is a perfect breather

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  40. force yourself to try new techniques

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  41. force yourself to try new languages

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  42. you’re not getting paid, so you can’t get fired

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  43. this makes people uncomfortable

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  44. the reality is your klout score matters

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  45. the reality is that publicity helps

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  46. you don’t know what you’ll launch tomorrow

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  47. exploiting open source for business

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  48. FORTUNE 100
    does open source or something

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  49. how do real businesses do open source?

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  50. .com / 37signals / api

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  51. .com / 37signals / api
    EXAMPLE CODE
    VERSIONED
    DIFFABLE

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  52. .com / github / github-services

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  53. .com / github / github-services
    SUPPORTS 110+ SERVICES
    LOL NO WAY
    WE COULD SELF-MANAGE

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  54. doing open source real good

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  55. your first pull request is sacred

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  56. don’t ruin someone’s first time

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  57. recognize that open source is scary

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  58. being helpful leads to more contributions

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  59. DO YOU KNOW
    GITHUB EVENT IS?
    WHAT THE BEST

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  60. private public

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  61. finished publicized

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  62. repos with just a README are sad :(

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  63. i love the reveal

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  64. this encourages sharing

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  65. this encourages tweeting

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  66. this encourages facebook like +1 gshare
    toot friendship toolchain
    emoji invite-only status

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  67. DOCS-FIRST
    DEVELOPMENT

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  68. this increases your code quality

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  69. this increases your code quality
    LOL I DONT CARE

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  70. READMEs, bootstrap scripts, issues
    mean less work for you

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  71. help people help you

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  72. I LOVE
    POINTLESS
    C O D E

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  73. < 50 LINES OF
    RIDICULOUS STRING
    MUTATION CODE >
    at some point
    i swear i will
    push code
    like this:
    def encrypt(password)
    return password
    end

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  74. it’s important to play

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  75. real-time communication using gifs

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  76. pushes text to client frame-by-frame

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  77. stretch your mind

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  78. also the shit’s just funny

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  79. build things

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  80. ZACHHOLMAN
    @HOLMAN

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