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The Zoo
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EMacIntyre
September 10, 2024
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17
The Zoo
A kid asks a teen for help finding their favorite animal on a field trip to the zoo
EMacIntyre
September 10, 2024
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Transcript
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Teen: [SIGH] I can’t believe I’m on this stupid field
trip
Teen: [SIGH] I can’t believe I’m on this stupid field
trip
Teen: [SIGH] I shoulda called in sick
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Teen: [SIGH] Just another day closer to graduation
Teen: [SIGH] Just another day closer to graduation
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Teen: Can I help you kid
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Kid: Well...
Kid: If you can help me,..
Kid: My mommy said I could get a stuffed animal
from the zoo gift shop
Kid: My mommy said I could get a stuffed animal
from the zoo gift shop
Kid: But I only have enough to get one so
I have to pick my favorite
Kid: But I only have enough to get one so
I have to pick my favorite
Kid: But I don’t know what my favorite is
Kid: But I don’t know what my favorite is
Kid: And I’m scared I’m gonna pick the wrong one
Kid: Will you help me?
Teen: I guess I’m not doin’ anything
Teen: Alright lets go
Teen: Alright lets go
Teen: I mean how hard can it be
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Teen: There. Penguins
Teen: Cute and cuddly.
Teen: Cute and cuddly.
Teen: Cute and cuddly.
Kid: I dunno....
Kid: They’re a little too...
Kid: [imitating penguin] WAH WAH WAH.
Kid: [imitating penguin] WAH WAH WAH.
Kid: [imitating penguin] WAH WAH WAH.
Kid: Y’know?.
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Kid: I guess a penguin can be my favorite...
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Teen: Come on, there’s a whole zoo of animals
Teen: Think I know somewhere you might like
Kid: What is it?
Kid: What is it?
Kid: What is it?
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Teen: The Savannah
Teen: The Savannah
Teen: It’s got all kinds of creatures kids love
Teen: It’s got all kinds of creatures kids love
Teen: It’s got all kinds of creatures kids love
Teen: Like lions! Majestic and fluffy
Kid: Well they seem kinda smug
Kid: Plus.. they’re just cats,
Kid: I don’t think they’re my favorite
Teen: That’s the beauty of the Savannah kid,
Teen: You got options
Teen: Keep up kid you’re about to meet
Teen: Keep up kid you’re about to meet
Teen: The majestic Elephant
Teen: The majestic Elephant
Teen: A little different, but oddly sweet
Teen: A little different, but oddly sweet
Teen: A little different, but oddly sweet
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Kid: But this elephant, she’s so smart
Kid: It feels wrong to limit her to just an
animal
Kid: It feels wrong to limit her to just an
animal
Teen: Ahh you’re thinkin’ too hard she’s perfect
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Teen: Okay you have a point
Teen: You got tons of more options but we better
pick up the pace
Teen: We’re gonna find you a favorite animal even if
we gotta search the entire zoo
Teen: We’re gonna find you a favorite animal even if
we gotta search the entire zoo
Teen: We’re gonna find you a favorite animal even if
we gotta search the entire zoo
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Zoo Guide: Would you kids like a map of the
zoo?
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Teen: Alright lets get this thing started! How about..
Teen [narrating]: An Armadillo!
Kid: Where is it
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Teen [narrating]: Rhinos!
Kid: The horn is cool but its a little too
peaceful
Kid: The horn is cool but its a little too
peaceful
Kid: The horn is cool but its a little too
peaceful
Kid: The horn is cool but its a little too
peaceful
Teen [narrating]: Goats?
[GOAT SCREAMS]l
[KID SCREAMS]l
[GOAT SCREAMS]l
[KID SCREAMS]l
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[BOTH SCREAM IN UNISON]l
Teen [narrating]: Tamarin?
Kid: This one kind of looks like my Uncle Rick
Kid: He’s loud and not very nice
Kid: My mommy says its because he hits the bottle
too much
Kid: My mommy says its because he hits the bottle
too much
Kid: But that doesn’t really make sense
Kid: But that doesn’t really make sense
Kid: I mean why would you hit bottles!
Kid: I mean why would you hit bottles!
Teen [narrating]: Reptile house?!
Kid: Not enough legs
Kid: Too many legs
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Kid: Too bulgy
Teen [narrating]: Horseshoe crab?
Kid: Uhh where’s its face?!
Kid: Uhh where’s its face?!
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Teen [narrating]: Pandas!!
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Teen: Yeah this one’s probably kind of boring for you
Kid: What’s that coming out of its butt?!
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Teen: MOVING ON
Teen[narrating]: Kangaroo!
Kid: This one seems too violent
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Kid: You see what I mean?!
Teen [narrating]: Komodo Dragon!!
Kid: This one doesn’t seem like it wants to be
cuddled!
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Teen [narrating]: Otters!
Kid: These ones have too much energy!
Kid: These ones have too much energy!
Kid: These ones have too much energy!
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Kid: Um.. this one looks like it wants to hurt
me and everyone I love while the world burns!
Teen: Ah c’mon kid its just an emu
Teen: Ah c’mon kid its just an emu
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Kid: Can we leave now?
Teen: Oh yeah
Kid: [SIGH] I’m never gonna find my favorite animal
Kid: [SIGH] I’m never gonna find my favorite animal
Kid: [SIGH] I’m never gonna find my favorite animal
Kid: [SIGH] I’m never gonna find my favorite animal
Kid: I guess I could just get a keychain...
Kid: I guess I could just get a keychain...
Kid: I guess I could just get a keychain...
Kid: I guess I could just get a keychain...
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Teen: Listen kid, you’re stressing yourself out!.
Teen: Listen kid, you’re stressing yourself out!.
Teen: If none of them are your favorite that thats
it!
Teen: If none of them are your favorite that thats
it!
Teen: A favorite animal is supposed to make you happy
Teen: A favorite animal is supposed to make you happy
Teen: I’m sure if we just look a little longer-
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Teen: What even is this thing
Kid: I dunno but I love it!
Teen: A Balaeniceps rex
Teen: or shoebill
Kid: He’s peerrfeect
Kid: He’s peerrfeect
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Teen: I honestly didn’t even think they’d make a plushie
of that thing
Teen: I honestly didn’t even think they’d make a plushie
of that thing
Teen: I honestly didn’t even think they’d make a plushie
of that thing
Teen: So why the shoebill anyways?
Teen: So why the shoebill anyways?
Teen: So why the shoebill anyways?
Kid: I dunno! He’s different!
Kid: I dunno! He’s different!
Kid: I dunno! He’s different!
Kid: I dunno! He’s different!
Kid: The other birds probably think he’s a little weird
Kid: The other birds probably think he’s a little weird
Kid: The other birds probably think he’s a little weird
Kid: and don’t like him much.
Kid: He probably has a hard time making friends
Kid: He probably has a hard time making friends
Kid: even though he’s nice
Kid: But that’s okay, because I’ll be his friend!
Kid: This was the best field trip ever!
Kid: This was the best field trip ever!
Kid: This was the best field trip ever!
Kid: Thank you for staying with me and helping me
find him!
Kid: Thank you for staying with me and helping me
find him!
Kid: Thank you for staying with me and helping me
find him!
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Teen: No problem kid.
Teen: No problem kid.
Teen: It really was the best field trip ever
Teen: It really was the best field trip ever
Teen: It really was the best field trip ever
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